The Overdramatized Farce: Why the World of Spying is On Life Support

“A vodka martini, shaken, not stirred.”

Those are some of the most famous words ever stated by James Bond, Britain, and perhaps the world’s number one “spy”. Total, the franchise has released 24 movies, and grossed a total of $6,197,879,442 in sales from movies alone, or just shy of 6.2 billion dollars. Not to mention games, action figures, shirts, and everything else engrossed with this franchise.

When we think of spying, we think of James Bond. But because that is an extremely difficult thing to apply to this community, I resorted to dictionary.com.

spy

/spaɪ/[spahy] noun, plural spies, verb, spied, spy·ing.

noun

1. a person employed by a government to obtain secret information or intelligence about another, usually hostile, country, especially with reference to military or naval affairs.
2. a person who keeps close and secret watch on the actions and words of another or others.
3. a person who seeks to obtain confidential information about the activities, plans, methods, etc., of an organization or person, especially one who is employed for this purpose by a competitor: an industrial spy.
4. the act of spying.

verb (used without object)

5. to observe secretively or furtively with hostile intent (often followed by on or upon ).
6. to act as a spy; engage in espionage.
7. to be on the lookout; keep watch.
8. to search for or examine something closely or carefully.

Now, you may ask, what am I talking about? Well, I have chosen to speak to you today because the spying community has been taking a fall for years now. And, unfortunately, it is now on life support. Just yesterday, Snaily5, 3ic of the Army of Club Penguin, released a post detailing an ACPSIS investigation of what is called the CP Illuminati. Now, we finally know that World War I is being re-enacted right before our eyes.

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See? Clearly, Dxdzn and Snaily have been sleeping together.

I joke about this because of its impending similarities, but the truth of the matter is that spying is not what it used to be. In this post, Snaily divulged that her, along with her brother, Mr. Waffle, who is an ACP General, are the current acting Heads of the ACPSIS. Now this, of course, is not new information to many in the community. I knew, and many of ACP knew. But the fact is that the majority of the army community did not know. Now, let me ask you why it makes sense to reveal that you are the acting Director of ACPSIS to your foes if you plan to continue gathering information against those foes. Spying isn’t spying if everyone knows you are spying.

You know, the funny thing that comes to mind here is those shows about the undercover bosses, where the heads of successful companies go in and work with those on the ground field. This, more than anything, is a prime example of what a spy in this community should be. Silent, and watching, and the only people who know they are the people helping them spy and the people they’re working for.

The fact is, the greatest “spies” of today aren’t spies. Spies are solely focused on achieving the information they want. They don’t allow themselves to be tampered with and they do not let their emotions get in the way. Spies use the information they own and give it to their boss and their boss only. They don’t sell it to media organizations or make deals with other people for the information, as has been the case with many of the NSSA leaks. Spies believe in the law of free-market trouncing. Meaning, if a member of their organization has information, they will allow that member to take credit for it, and not censor it from the person they are working for because they wish to find it themselves. Most importantly and finally, spies never, ever, beat their chests. They don’t come out and tell the world they are running the most successful spy organization in armies — if the ACPSIS can even be called that nowadays.

Sun Tzu, the ancient Chinese military general, once said the following.

“It is only the enlightened ruler and the wise general who will use the highest intelligence of the army for the purpose of spying, and thereby they achieve great results.”

What I’m saying here is that those who used to call themselves spies, used to be good at what they did. Kenneth1000, former Director of the ACPSIS, was good at what he did. Mchappy, ACPSIS Agent, was good at what he did, so was Jcapp of the same organization, as much as his reputation has been tarnished. Shiver of the NSSA was good at what he did. And none of these people beat their chests, they just do what they do. Kenneth1000, Former ACPSIS Director and ACP 2ic, had this to say about the events of the post.

This was highly embarassing for both Snaily and Waffle. It should have never been posted in the way that it was. It sounded rediculous and far fetched, and I am a bit annoyed that they would implicate my best friend a.k.a. Flipper in a plot against the ACP. Boomer or Funks should have been consulted prior to making the post to see if everything seems legit and feasible. Although I don’t think Snaily is a noob, it unfortunately reinforces the idea that ACP has noob leaders and soldiers.

And one other plank in this entire platform. Why the hell would any of these “CP Illuminati” tell an ACP Soldier of their plans? It’s very simple why. Because they are not actually capable of anything, they simply like to hear themselves talk. If this people were hackers, capable hackers — which is extremely unlikely in this small facet of the MMO that is Club Penguin — they would simply go about their work, and they would only take credit once the job was done. Only once the site was fully in their control would they take credit. I’d like to now refer to Boomer’s comment on the post.

 As for the other “informants”, they’re just trying to cause controversy. None of the hacking-based actions referenced are even possible anyway. You can’t embed malware into a WordPress site, and you can’t DDoS a xat chat without taking down an entire server belonging to xat, which no one here is capable of doing.

Which means a few things. Number one, that this “spying”, wasn’t spying at all, because these people simply came out and told them. That isn’t a successful collection of information, it’s a few people who like to scare the s*** out of you, and you, because you are gullible enough to be scared, are an easy target for them.

Flipper, Former ACP Leader and one of the two attacked in Snaily’s post, had this to say.

She said I shouldn’t be trusted for giving the pass of a protected post to a close friend and former high-ranking soldier of ACP, who was interested in helping, which is kind of stupid, especially when if they didn’t want anyone seeing it, they should have made it private, so no outsiders could gain access. I took the piss out of her CP Illuminati idea as it’s as ludicrous as it sounds, and I think now everyone will join me [in] laughing at it.

On the overall ordeal, but more specifically on the issue regarding Flipper and Foldez, Bluesockwa2 had this to say.

When I was contacted by an ACP member about the early this morning, my response to them was as follows:

“Your proof is skeptical at best, your preaching an overly complex scheme that seems to overlap and contradict often, and you got the information from defectors. In my personal opinion, you’ve been setup.”

BA hoped that if they gave you false information about their plans that you would post it like this.

I highly doubt those are real plans, though they might be similar to a real scheme. In addition to sowing distrust in your ranks, it makes you (and ACP) look panicked and disorganized.

Even if it is true, information is always more powerful in the hands of the few than the many. If these are real BA plans, they will change them once they realize you know. If you had not released them, you could use the info to act on and defend the attack.

I’m just warning you that I think the negatives outweigh the positives here, but the damage is done.”

I still stand by such, and Blue1 has elaborated on it wonderfully in this post. As he said, these so-called overarching power organizations simply cannot exist here, and so many of these seemingly terrible plans fall apart very, very quickly.

Some months ago I myself made a post about the necessity of spies in armies and my argument for their existence:
“Banning spying in war or battles is essentially a cowardly move. People don’t want to have to deal with the possibility, so they just outlaw it. I know many are in favor of simplifying armies, taking away the flame and politics, however, simpler isn’t always better. Spies force you to carefully safeguard your plans, thus increasing the effectiveness of them, since armies won’t see it coming. They also add another level of realism and, I believe, fun. I enjoy the complexity and politics, and I think spying is a tactic too often ignored nowadays.

Spying is a crucial part of our history, and one that I would like to see returning to prominence. I encourage armies to explore resurrecting spies and spying divisions. I think you will find that it is not only an effective tool, it will also help make your soldiers more mature and successful. (Many of the greats in ACP, for example, went through SSACP.) The bottom line is this: spying is not one of the things armies are better off without. They keep armies interesting, they keep leaders on their toes, and they bring in recruits.”

I again still believe this statement holds true, and while I could go on I believe Blue1 has sufficiently covered such in his post. Rather, I’d like to explore a correlation made only in passing: the linking of Foldez and Flipper to these so-called spying operations.

As most of us are well aware much of the recent tension in ACP has centered around the relationship between Snaily/Waffle and Flipper/Foldez. The two sides have been, for lack of a better term, feuding for some weeks now. Up until recently I would have considered Snaily and Waffle to be the innocents, the ones being attacked. But what I see now, in this concoction of the ACPSIS, is a poorly disguised plot to push for Foldez and Flipper’s firing.

There, I said it. This is yet another thinly veiled plot in an ongoing sequence.  And it is a disgraceful misuse of what should be an honorable organization, and a blatant disregard for the principles of that organization.

This convoluted scheme not only disgraces the acting commanders of the ACPSIS, it disgraces the organization and the army as a whole, and spreads the seeds of unnecessary distrust throughout our community. It is a violation of everything spying should be, and it is a gross misrepresentation of nonexistent facts.

And all of this, this madness and chaos, stems from a simple feud. Can you see where I’m going with this? Anger and hatred have destroyed a once great order. And on a larger scale, anger and hate are tearing down the foundations of all we have ever built.

So this is what I ask you, both members of ACP and all armies. How much longer will you allow this to go on? Until we’ve destroyed everything we’ve built, or will you act? With the Black Wars finally over, we’ve reached a crucial opportunity for action. Because we, unlike James Bond, can’t magically get ourselves out of every poor situation we get into. We are  not invincible, even if we think we are. And if we don’t do something, that will catch up to us sooner than we think.

And in closing, regarding the attacks on Flipper and Foldez, the two have completely nothing to do with this entire thing, on top of the fact that they are actually correct to laugh at what was said, because they have been here long enough to know that a CP Illuminati is, first of all, nonexistent, and, second of all, impossible.

The most honest-to-god 1,194 words this damn community has ever seen.

๖̶̶̶ۣۜмaтт.вℓυєѕσ¢кωa1

CPA Central CEO

~with help from Beautiful Creatures a.k.a Jessie~

22 Responses

  1. LOL I think Snaily was getting false information

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  2. Snaily not only made herself look stupid in front of most of ACP, she destroyed the dignity of SSACP along with Waffle. No, in fact she proved something people were trying to find out since December… that ACP is in such deep shit, that they can not hire anyone better than two noobs to be head of SSACP, the former very dignified organization of SSACP. Now don’t go asking me why I left ACP, and here’s the reason. Snaily’s post isn’t even funny…. it’s plain stupid.

    I can’t even believe how low ACP has fallen in a few months.

    PS: A MoH soldier (Flipper) trying to “destroy” ACP? *facepalm*

    Like

  3. “America, and perhaps the world’s number one “spy”.” HE’S A BRITISH CHARACTER, MADE BY A BRITISH AUTHOR. >;@
    And also,it’s 6.2 billion not trillion D:.
    Sorry *wary*

    Like

  4. James bond was made by ian flemming 1908-1964 he was a spy for the british in ww2 and then made the james bond into novels in the 1950s his 1st book casino royal came out in 1953 and the movie came out in 2006 almsot all the 007 movies are from his books the first james bond movie came out in 1962 Dr. No james bond was played by sean corrney from 1962-1967 and once more in dimoands are forever in 1971 before he retired the role to roger moore then timothy dalton, pirence bronson and now danial craig.

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  5. Pretty good post, I agree it is the most honest to god words we will ever see.

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  6. “CP Illuminati” – You gotta be joking right

    Like

  7. I agree with Aaron somewhat. It was a pretty good post overall.

    Like

  8. Best post I read in a long time. Very good Blue.

    Like

  9. “See? Clearly, Dxdzn and Snaily have been sleeping together.”

    Hahahaha.

    Like

  10. This whole thing is probably the most bs I can take for awhile.
    But plotting to fire me isn’t very original, this was like attempt 3 or maybe 4..all with the same person heading them or playing a key role.
    Cookie to whoever guesses right.

    Like

  11. Always expecting some bull from ACP every few weeks.
    This is just a signal of ACP’s end.

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  12. Am I the only one wondering why this is stickied?

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  13. Who stirs a martini? Honestly.

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  14. Example of a terrible “Spy”: Track_Star_Ilikecheeze (ACP SPY) Case stands.

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  15. Why is it that people seem to think that they can make a post more professional or something by putting a quotation in italics at the top of their post? I know it’s nitpicking but I’ve seen it a few times and it’s wearing a little thin.

    Like

  16. […] MARCH 2013: The Overdramatized Farce: Why the World of Spying is On Life Support […]

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